Throwback Thursday: I I Used To Not Eat Dessert!

This Thursday I’m going to get a little deep…

For years I had a terrible relationship with food. I would only eat things that were low calorie, low fat and “healthy”. I would even eat things that I didn’t like just because I thought they wouldn’t make me get fat. And dessert..haha yea right. At this point I can say I think it was about control, but I don’t really know what started it. Basically I was very skinny and very hungry. I thought I would never get over my disordered thoughts, and probably never completely will, but it took getting pregnant for me to really change my ways. You would think that getting pregnant and gaining weight would have been a terrible experience for me, but it really changed the way I thought about food completely. Partially because at that point I was no longer eating just for me, but for someone else. Also weight/looks just seemed so unimportant knowing that I was about to bring another life into this world.

Did I gain weight? Yes, I was pregnant. But I found that by allowing myself to eat whatever I wanted, I actually craved real food and ate pretty healthy and only gained 20 pounds. And after Levi was born, I STILL ate whatever I wanted and the weight fell right off and I was back in my pre-pregnancy jeans in 2 weeks. I totally believe in eating healthy and try to most of the time but I also believe in indulging in your cravings. I have a thing with sweets, and you better believe that after dinner I am going to eat dessert!

I’ve also gained a better relationship with exercise. Honestly I didn’t really do any type of working out while I was pregnant until the last month when I was trying to get him out of there! So I lost a lot of muscle and my endurance levels were wayyy down. So after I fully healed I was hesitant to start working out again. I’ve learned that I am the type who doesn’t do well with schedules when it comes to working out. When I try to stick to a schedule I end up getting burned out. I actually work out more when I just free-ball it. So that’s how I started working out again and what I am still doing now. These days I am doing pretty well at walking/running on the treadmill at least 20 minutes a day and doing strength work outs throughout the day. For me this is what is working at the moment. Some people are the opposite and do better with schedules, I say do whatever works for you!

I do still have days where it’s hard and I feel like a whale, but I think part of that is just being a girl. I don’t think anyone is ever 100% happy with their body. For me it took having a baby and seeing that their is so much more in life to worry about then what I look like all the time. I now have a child who depends on me and that is so much more important!